And yet trying so hard to make sense of the big world around him.

By Mommy

It’s June, and our little Rowan is five years old, which means it’s time to get ready for kindergarten.  We’ve been talking about the changes that are coming, how most of his friends will be going to different schools, and the new rules and experiences that will come with his own new school, so Rowan has some vague idea of what to expect.  Hence I wasn’t surprised when I woke him up this morning and asked him if he knew what today is.  “I register for kindergarten!”

Despite his brave front, I realized just how apprehensive he was when a few minutes before leaving the house he was standing by the front door with his fingers firmly grasped around his hair, Rowan’s way of dealing with stress since he was an infant.  But he didn’t say anything about how he felt, so we had a pleasant walk to the new school, commenting about restaurants along the way, the cars speeding past, and the cool map of the U.S. painted on the ground in front of the school.

Upon entering the building, we signed in at security and he went a few paces ahead of me to the registration office, when he suddenly turned around, stepped back, and gave me a very tight hug.  I expected so see tears when we pulled apart, but instead he looked around hopefully and expectantly.  I don’t know what he was looking for, but he must have found it because he was still happy and chatty when we left.

The courage and optimism of these little five year olds is truly amazing. They miss their mommies and daddies when they’re even a minute late picking them up, and yet they’re able to take complete joy in a tiny plastic dinosaur or a drop of rain that falls on their nose. Rowan and his Bumblebee classmates graduate next week.  Everything they’ve learned, everything they’ve experienced together, will have an impact on everything they do going forward.  When I see them together, I really am able to muster hope for the future.

To sing

To laugh

To teach

To learn

To journey forth

And always be our Little Guy

I miss you too sweetness.

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